The mind thinks it's in control

A Poem on the inner dialogue of running

Fridays are for poetry and exploring a creative side of writing about my training experiences in sport. I hope you enjoy!

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“Just make it past that next sign, nothing else matters until then”

The mind wins again over the body, or so it seems

I don’t remember what mile it is, not that it matters anyways

But I am willing myself forward, step by step

Hold on a minute, does my mind actually will anything?

Is it the part of me that summons strength to defy reason?

No, no, no, it’s the rational part, the part that makes sense.

Oh, I’m onto you now, cleaver mind, always trying to trick me

You desire the shortcut, you desire the easy road, you desire efficiency

You proudly cut corners and backfill excuses to make decisions seem justified

And now you’re trying to take credit for something you’re not capable of doing!

I’m tired, my body is sore, I don’t want to run anymore

But yet I am still running, still moving, still conquering

The mind wants to shut it down, take off, and figure out what to tell others and myself about how ‘quitting’ was really the only smart option left to take

So what is moving me forward?

What is the source of this inner dialogue?

I’m negotiating with something, but it’s not the mind

It’s my spirit, my willpower, my determination

It’s the lower self vs. the higher self

“Don’t worry about integrity, use your wits to manipulate the situation”

That’s what the mind says

“KEEP MOVING FORWARD NO MATTER WHAT”

That’s the spirit angry in retort, the higher self winning the debate

This dialogue is projected in the mind but fought in the heart

It confused me at first, but now I see it clearly

I’m engaged in a spiritual battle

The mind is along for the ride

And the body is moving us along, right on cue

Well, what do you know, that sign just flew right past me

Guess I can keep going

Now how far?