Getting what you need, not what you want

Too much stuff

Have you noticed that there’s not a lack of wanting in our daily lives?

• Want the newest, latest, thing? Amazon will ship it to your house by day’s end.

• Did you catch the latest hot show? Binge watch the whole thing on Netflix tonight.

• There’s a new restaurant opening down the block? Send a delivery driver to have it at my door in 30 minutes or less.

The convenience and saturation of stuff in our lives is a modern luxury that I don’t want to take for granted. It’s amazing to be able to drive a few minutes down the road and pick between six different options of medicine for my kids when they are sick. I’m not suggesting we abandon modern conveniences.

However, I will ask a pointed question that should make you think hard.

How much of all the stuff do we really need?

Starting a 50mile trail race in the dark, the opposite of expedient!

And if we just endeavored to do a few things in a less convenient way how would that impact the way our lives felt day to day, would we find more meaning in the trade off for less expediency?

Aiming at true needs

“Every path but your own is the path of fate. Keep on your own track then.” - Thoreau, Walden pg 107

I was talking to a teammate last night on our Tribal Bookclub call and we got talking about how to parent our children to understand the difference between ‘wants’ and ‘needs’. As often is the case, the discussion around children turned into reflections about ourselves (kids are the greatest teachers in the world)

When Thoreau escaped into the woods for two years, he was just at the beginning edge of the knife of modernism and industrialism. Now we have the digital age and things go FAST. Too FAST.

The speed of progress distorts what we need. Truly need.

It points us to competing in the world of stuff instead of the world of virtue and character.

In sports talk, that’s us aiming for the individual trophies at the expense of team success. To give into selfish desires to be judged by the accomplishments of others rather than to rest on our characters and actions in victory or defeat.

We care not to play the right way, we only play to win.

And the problem with this stance is that when you do win, you realize that it’s all empty. You’ve really lost. But now it’s too late.

You’re aim was WAY OFF. Ever wonder why so many people have ‘midlife’ crises when they seemingly have gotten everything they wanted?

It’s because none of them aimed at what they truly needed.

The Value of Daily Training

When viewed properly as a spiritual exercise, physical activity helps to reorient our understanding of wants and needs and has the power to properly aim us towards what’s truly necessary to live a meaningful and happy life.

This can only happen when you tie your training directly through your heart through passion and creativity. The training becomes an expression of your spiritual drive towards excellence for it’s own sake.

That love anchors you in a process of discipline and commitment. And clarifies what matters and what doesn’t in a powerful way.

Here’s a quick example I’ve seen from a homie I’ve been coaching the past few months.

He used to worry too much about politics, the big important kind we’re all told we need to stay ‘informed’ about.

This caused him to unnecessarily dwell on the difficulties in some close relationships that frayed over time due politics.

Once we started training from the heart, he began to off load some of that baggage in hard runs and long bike rides. He loved the feeling moving his body gave him and we started to connect that with ‘offloading’ the need to dive into politics all the time.

Instead, he started leading with positive energy and repairing those relationships with his example.

What did he want? For people to leave him alone about his politics, but without him having to give up the need to make it all about politics.

What did he need? To forget about politics and focus on the value of relationships.

The training helped him focus on the true signal, not the artificial want that was making him unhappy and miserable.

The Takeaway

When you feel your life spinning away from you, like it has no aim or purpose, slow down and ask yourself this very important question?

What am I wanting here, and is it truly what I need?

And utlizie the signal you get from daily training to help calibrate your aim.

The honesty of the effort of physical exertion moves us towards the truth that’s in our hearts. The objective leads towards the subjective.

It’s where you know yourself, truly. Start here when you’re lost or drifting.

Use the training to refocus your aim, and go after what’s truly meaningful instead of what’s just expedient and comfortable.

Happy Training Team!